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Sunday, April 4, 2004

Miscellaneous Humor About Couples

I wouldn’t even begin to try and count how many old printouts and tucked-away e-mails I have laying around with tidbits of humor on them. In an effort to throw them away, but not forget them, I will occasionally reproduce them here for posterity! Here’s what I found today.

Romance Mathematics
Smart Man + Smart Woman = Romance
Smart Man + Dumb Woman = Affair
Dumb Man + Smart Woman = Marriage
Dumb Man + Dumb Woman = Pregnancy

Office Arithmetic
Smart Boss + Smart Employee = Profit
Smart Boss + Dumb Employee = Production
Dumb Boss + Smart Employee = Promotion
Dumb Boss + Dumb Employee = Overtime

Shopping Math
A man will pay $2 for a $1 item he needs.
A woman will pay $1 for a $2 item she doesn’t need.

General Equations and Statistics
A woman worries about the future until she gets a husband.
A man never worries about the future until he gets a wife.
A successful man makes more money than his wife can spend.
A successful woman is able to find this man.

To be happy with a man, you must understand him a lot and love him a little. To be happy with a woman, you must love her a lot and try not to understand her at all.

Any married man should forget his mistakes. There’s no use in two people remembering the same thing.

Men wake up as good-looking as when they went to bed.
Women somehow deteriorate during the night.

Discussion Technique
A woman has the last word in any argument.
Anything a man says after that is the beginning of a new argument.

Propensity to Change
A woman marries a man expecting that he will change, but he doesn’t. A man marries a woman expecting that she won’t change, and she does.

» Posted by ALBj at 11:35 PM (ET)
Category: Funny


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